Category Archives: human

Church, stop bullying me – the alchemy of pain

 

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Thank you peeps for all your love and support through this difficult grieving time. It is a roller-coaster ride, and this weekend presented an opportunity for the lowest of lows by the callous, insensitive & unloving actions of others. ☹️

I’ve made some new friends and lost some {I guess they were not friends to begin with} I’ve seen behaviour that shocks me, betrayal close to Judas and Brutus but I’m stating for the record: unlike Jesus and Ceaser getting killed. I still live to tell the tale, (though they try to push me to the depths of despair, lol🤣.)  And I will, as it is a good one!!!

Sisters, please watch your backs, not everyone who calls you sister has your back, indeed some covet what you have  and will go to any length to attain it. With their clever manipulation and what I now know to be “gas-lighting” tactics one proved my suspicions right, successfully in the most spectacular way possible!! There is a God of justice after all!! 🤣

Yes, it’s a paradox, that I feel victorious even in the face of loss!! The value of one revealing their character and true intention without a shadow of doubt is priceless, pure gold. A lesson for all to learn on how to guard against this in the future. It hurts me that some other friends got hurt because of their action but I guess ces’t lack vie!! You live and learn not to make certain mistakes again.

I have also witnessed and continued to see and enjoy the limitless abundance and supply of grace and blessings from Father God through the universe from the spirit realm. (Still asking where is Mother God?!🙄)

But:

I have had to learn the hard way to;

Protect my table, cast not my pearls before swines, they will rend you!! I will reveal all in my new book, “Church, stop bullying me, the alchemy of suffering” by Lara Rose

 (© Lara Rose 14/06/18 unedited)

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It’s not that no one cares…

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It’s not that no one cares, it’s just no one knows what to do!!

It’s not that no one cares, from preacher to absent mothers to doting teachers and self help coaches.
It just that no one really knows what to do to fix the big mess the earth is in!! At the best some bury their heads in the sand or run away, to avoid the pain of reality. At the worse, some claim to have the solution with lofty ideals but unwittingly or sometimes deliberately prey on others. Selah

Both scenarios, and there are more, are only following the flow of nature as it stands today. An amoeba will move away from a region of unpleasant stimulus conversely, a lion will prey on another! C’est la vie!

It seems no amount of motivational training, or positive thinking can change the order of things. Do I sound like the preacher in the book of Ecclesiastis? When he says, “all is folly, just eat, drink and be merry” Aha!

Hence to the dismay of many, clambering at the base of the 3-4-5 triangle.
Scrimping & scratching, and even the guru knows, he or she doesn’t know, and feels like a fraud when eventually reaches out to the ones he seeks to help with a collection tray!

Anyway, what do I know!!!

© Lara Rose 9/1/17 (First draft unedited)

 

 


I do not know …

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I don’t know what is wrong with me so I don’t know how to fix me.
I don’t know who I am or where I belong in order to find the tribe of people who will completely and unconditionally accept and understand me.
From church organisations, educational institutions to musical or artistic explorations;
From African visitations, family expectations to globetrotting expeditions;
Historical lectures of torturous pasts, stories and tales of glorious kingdoms don’t last;
I still don’t know what is wrong with me, so I can fix me.
Redemption promise, washed in blood,
Why blood, why so much blood?! 😞
Brown, black, beige or orange.
Eniyan dudu, eniyan pupa, kilode?
Oh, Africa, I do not know what is wrong with me, so I can fix me.
Is it my muddied dirty skin?
Is it my tangled bushy thorny hair?
Is it the unholy liason with the fathers who steal my dignity over and over again?
Is it the casting away of her daughters, oh motherland?
Are you so ashamed of me, does my visage disgust you?
I do not know what is wrong with me so I can fix me;
Is it because I pray in a foreign tongue?
Are the gods angered that I turn my back on them?
Does the god of Iron despise the god of Abraham?
Are they at war with each other?
Oh, Abba Father, how will the truth be revealed?
Oh, what is wrong with me, so I can fix me?
Don’t know who I am, what I am! Church tells me I am a child of God, a holy priesthood and such lofty ideals;
Yet still like a stranger, imposter I feel in the midst of the congregation.
Oh why, oh why, oh, be at peace for now oh troubled soul.
I do not know what is wrong with me, so I can fix me!

© Lara Rose 2016

Written as part of my end of term assignment APD Leeds Beckett university.


Playing our part, purpose?!

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In the film Hugo, the young orphan boy saw the whole world as a machine. His understanding was all the parts in a machine played a role and so he believed he was here to play a role too!  He wondered  because  he knew how to fix broken machines, if he could fix broken people too! 😊

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I may not know what my specific purpose is but I believe I’m here to play a part in my life, city, nation, earth, universe, multiverse!! © Lara Rose ’16


love is …

love is


A Dark Day

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A dark day
I don’t mean the darkened clouds
I don’t mean the pouring rain
I don’t mean the howling sound of a passing hurricane or a storm
I feel the blood drain from my brain
My heart heavy cannot comprehend
Why oh why do we hurt each other?
Why oh why do we run from each other?
Why oh why, sister against brother?
Why oh why, father against mother?
Will love ever reign?
Will love ever be a beacon raised high in the sky?
Will we ever come together as one, be one?
Oh, let there be light!
Light shine over the darkness!

A darkened day. 😞

RIP Jo! 😢

© Lara Rose 16 June 2016

Galleria L’Artiste:
“A dark day in June!” © Lara Rose 2016

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#journey
#poetry
#nomadwoman
#photo
#photocontest
#popart
#gallerialatiste
#myart

 


Colour me …

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…colour me with words, speechless to say, tis rainbow speak thou for me…

© Lara Rose 2016


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